OnTrac to Emotional Intelligence

OnTrac to Emotional Intelligence

OnTrac Coaching

Christine Clarke-Swift MS

www.ontrachypnosis.com

Human intelligence is multifaceted and complex, including but not limited to: emotional, interpersonal, intra-personal (relationship) intelligence, linguistic (language), kinesthetic (body), musical (auditory), naturalistic and existential intelligence as defined by Howard Gardner in 1983. The purpose of this article will be on the emotional and relationship aspects of intelligence. It has been known and experienced for years that IQ testing has been emphasized in formal educational settings to provide data for educational standards as well as industrial utilization. However, Gardner argues that IQ tests only measures linguistic and logical-mathematical abilities. Although this is denied by other experts in the field, I can attest to my own experience that testing only measured a very small aspect of my overall intelligence.

We are unique in our capacities, gifts and talents just as we are unique in our intelligence. Living life intelligently, living life fully has meant for many of us learning about all aspects of human intelligence informally because formal education does not teach developing, building, growing and grooming relationships throughout life. We have all learned and acquired this knowledge through informal processes. Learning how to be in a healthy relationship with your self and having healthy relationships with others is something most of us learned as the models around behaved and one learned by default to make choices that elicits pain or pleasure.

First and foremost one has to learn about having and being in a healthy relationship with the self before we can navigate the waters of being in a healthy relationship with someone else. A relationship with others takes place simultaneously as we develop a relationship with the self and as you know your self better you can then improve the quality of relationships with others. A healthy relationship means having healthy self esteem, self respect and the wisdom to understand the difference of healthy relationships vs. unhealthy relationships.

We enter our primary years of education at the age of six and leave high school around the age of eighteen.  Years of formal learning emphatically teach reading, writing and arithmetic with a sprinkling of understanding about human relationships. The time has arrived when the formal education for learning about relationships within our selves and outside of our selves is crucial. Developing the self for healthy relationships means becoming more conscious and aware of ourselves and our purpose while we are here in this lifetime. 

How do we understand or improve our level of emotional intelligence? We begin with knowing more, understanding our attitude and perceptions of ourselves and others.  Our attitude is one thing that we have control with, over and in.  We own our attitude no one else does.  We need a balance of ingredients including the following but not limited to: compassion, caring, love, understanding, family, friends, connective-ness, communication, teaching, honesty, humanity, humility, touch, exercise, patience, harmony, quite-ness, open mindful thinking, confidence and self respect to have a great attitude about life and others. In other words, having the experience of all our emotions born by our perceptions and learning how to manage them instead of our emotions being in control of us provides a edge we all need to navigate the waters of life. This in brief is about having emotional intelligence an understanding to improving quality of life.

We have been taught and learned in this culture impatience, disrespect, instant gratification, disconnection, greed, distance, chaos, discord, having more is better and rule with one single emotion, anger. We need to have all our emotions available to us to provide a healthier quality of life as well as a way to manage our emotions is key to quality of life.

A higher level of consciousness allows us to live fully at the present moment, happier, healthier human beings rather than a human doing. A human being rather than a human doing is one living on purpose. A human doing goes about life subjected to every little whim the subconscious mind directs it to do. This is where people sometimes end up living their lives out feeling unhappy, doing things and regretting what has been done. Being in a position of regrets perpetuates self put downs and the cyclical pattern spirals out of control.  Knowing one has choices and one that takes responsibility for the choices made each and every time constitutes more positive outcomes. 

Living life dictated by the subconscious mind is victimizing, controlling and ultimately living life not at ease or dis-eased.  Unhappiness, unrest and down right misery is experienced when life continues to be lived dictated by the subconscious rather than being fully aware of what the subconscious is offering. Is it offering true or false information for your life now? The subconscious part of our mind is the store house of all our experiences. Maybe all our experiences were not calm, serene, loving, gracious, respectful and honor a fully human experience. The good news is we do not have to live the rest of our lives as victims of the subconscious mind. Living life in its richest fullness is not living life controlling others.  Trying to control others is futile behavior.  The only thing we have full control over, when we live life from the prospective as human beings, is the actions, decisions and choices we make about ourselves responsibly.  Taking responsibility for the choices, actions and decisions we make on a daily basis is living with integrity, grace, respect, humor, flexibility and honor as well as forgiveness of ourselves and others when we are not fully conscious of our actions or behavior. It is never too early or too late to get your life OnTrac. 

Empower your self and others by going beyond your fears by jump-starting your transformation by emailing to; Christine@ontrachypnosis.com ) about what you have done to live life more consciously. There are multiple tools to help live a life more consciously. Go to Christine@ontrachypnosis.com or on the web at www.ontrachypnosis.com or call 603.702.0649.  Christine Clarke-Swift is a speaker, trainer, Life Transformational Coach, NLP Master Practitioner, NGH Board Certified Hypnotist and a NGH Certified Instructor.

OnTrac Coaching to Overcoming Procrastination

OnTrac to Overcoming Procrastination Coaching 2012

www.ontrachypnosis.com

One of the action steps you can utilize to overcome procrastination is by recognizing the behavior.  As you are reading this article I’m challenging you to now put into action some of the suggestions that will help you on your way to new behavior. New behavior leads to better quality of living. I also challenge you to ask yourself ‘What if procrastination doesn’t exist but untamed decision making does?” Wouldn’t that change the landscape of how you think about procrastination?

Why do I call it ‘untamed’ decision making? That is because your decision making abilities need to be creatively tuned providing a process of improved decision making ability. Decision making is a learned skill and just like any other skill you learned you can improve upon its’ effectiveness.

Utilizing the acronym O.N.T.R.A.C. let’s take a closer look at how you might perceive procrastination and overcome its label. The O stands for being OPEN and I’m going out on a limb here but if you’re reading this you are already being open to learning something new. The N stands for NEW, ask yourself how you can look at the current situation or circumstance in a new light; in other words perceive the situation or circumstance differently. T stands for TRUE-VALUE. Ask yourself what am I truly valuing or not valuing that constitutes something getting done? You are already motivated in your life to ‘getting something done’ so it becomes a question of what you value. R stands for REACTION/RELATIONSHIP to what is getting done or not getting done or what you are procrastinating about. What is your relationship to what you want to accomplish? This brings you back to questioning yourself about the true value of what you want to do or not. A represents ACTION required to get what you value done. You have to value the circumstance or situation enough to see what action needs to take place and accomplish what you set out to do. C is for COOPERATION. Understand that life is about being interdependent and not always dependent or independent. If you truly understand this concept then it is easy to ask for help to get that project done that you have been procrastinating about. However if this is not any easy task for you then this is an area that needs some work. If asking for help is one of the things that will stop you from moving forward with the project then you just hit-the-nail-on-the-head. You now can see what needs to happen first before you get to the next step of actually accomplishing that project or whatever it is that you feel you have been procrastinating to accomplish.

Improve self esteem and motivation by learning a few tools to reduce fear that maybe causing you from moving your life forward.

Everyone can benefit from learning several ways to remove the procrastination, freeing up that energy.

Re-energize your life now. You can take action NOW by calling (603.702.0649) or join this class to learn several ways to remove the procrastination: I will be facilitating a ‘Overcoming Procrastination’ workshop at Northern Essex Community College, Lawrence Riverwalk Campus; April 14^th, Sat 9:30am -1pm. Call 978.556.3000 to register for this class.

Christine Clarke-Swift is a speaker, trainer, Life Strategist Coach, NLP Master Practitioner, NGH Board Certified Hypnotist and a NGH Certified Instructor. She achieved an MS in Community Psychology and BS in Human Services. Christine draws on her 20 plus years experience in the field of Human Services as well as 20 plus years of experience in the world of business to fortify her career as a Life Success Coach and business owner of OnTrac Coaching & Training. Email: Christine@ontrachypnosis.com or on the web at www.ontrachypnosis.com